July is awesome because it's Art Fight month. 2026 has been a record low year in regards to my Art Output (I think I finished one piece in the first half of 2026 that I actually put effort into and liked), but for some reason back in June I really started to fall in love with drawing again. This year, I somehow drew more for Art Fight than I have since 2020. This was still a measly 14 attacks, but I feel pretty accomplished in that! I am a pretty slow artist and generally give up super easily, so I've never managed to get much done during Art Fight. And I'm also actually happy with everything I drew for others this year!

There are of course a few life factors into why I was able to draw so much this month. A big one is of course that I have not been busy this summer, but I've had a much lower output in previous years where I was even less busy. The bigger factor is that I have finally been getting help for OCD, which had kept me from properly engaging with Art Fight, and art in general, for basically the past decade. I genuinely used to be too scared to attack people first unless we were good friends already, and I even struggled with revenges because I was so scared of getting something wrong. This year, I wasn't worried about things not being perfect or making mistakes. I even managed to draw for people I didn't know too well FIRST! Instead of it just being revenges.

Another big thing is that I started really enjoying Procreate for iPad. I first got my iPad back in 2021 (It was my first Big purchase after getting a job), and despite Procreate being THE art program for ipad, I did not like drawing in it at all for the next 5 years. I could not imagine finishing a single piece in that program. I literally paid for a subscription for Clip Studio Paint so that I wouldn't have to deal with Procreate. And to be honest I still do not think Procreate is a perfect program. I honestly don't even know if it's a Good art program. The features it lacks are infuriating. It is too simple in the most frustrating ways. Why does the fill tool suck? Why can't you select/transform multiple layers? Why is there no good way to save my pen size?

However I am also someone who kind of loves having certain limitations in art programs. I grew up learning how to draw digitally with programs like DrawSomething2 and Pixlr.com(Which was a shitty Photoshop clone back in 2013 and is now an AI Image Generator. Sad), and I enjoyed using mspaint a lot in my teens. So I've started enjoying Procreate despite all of its limitations. Also, I've found some really fun lineart brushes that I haven't been able to replicate in Clip Studio on my PC yet. And something about Procreate on my iPad just feels like I'm drawing in a more advanced version of my real life sketchbook(which I honestly don't use enough anymore). Maybe that's why so many people like it?

Last year, my laptop broke down at the very beginning of July, and I was really sad that I would have to use my ipad for the rest of my Art Fight pieces. This year,I actively chose to use my ipad for most of my attacks. And I had so much fun! I had so much fun this art fight!!!!! I love drawing and I love characters!!!!!!!

Even outside of Art Fight, I have felt a lot more inspired lately, at least creatively. My last journal was pretty sad, which I didn't realize until after I published it. I've been in a much better mood as of late. Nothing's great yet, but I have a feeling that things will work out in the end. I've been thinking it's about time to start a new creative project or something. Maybe some new website pages? I can't promise anything, especially since I keep having to be away from my computer for weeks at a time. But I'm glad I've been having fun creating again. Smiles

I had been working on a journal entry for so long that I just couldn't word right at all, I remade this page so that I wouldn't have to. I've decided to archive the old posts, instead of fully deleting them like I did back in 2022. I don't know Who would even want to see those, but if you feel like studying me like a bug or amoeba under a microscope, go ahead. I don't really feel like the same person I was in college, so I don't know if you'll be getting any accurate present-day magnapina views, but maybe it's fun. I know I like reading peoples old online journals.

Remaking this page was pretty fun actually. It took way less time than I thought it would (though I've spent forever just trying to write a Journal Entry). And it's coded better than the old version, which didn't work great on phone screens. Despite my slowness, I've learned a bit about html/css that's really helped me make website pages that don't suck(hopefully?). It feels a little barren, and I'm also bad at finding fonts, so things might change in the future. We will see. I'm doing my best.

Honestly it's just been difficult to even think of what to put in an Online Journal. We do not need a Magnapina Mental Health Update (it's bad). We don't need to think about it. It's already halfway through 2026 and I've done very little. A tiny bit of good from my year: Despite being horrifically depressed, I took up running, for some reason, and I managed to run my first real 5 mile race last week. I never thought I'd be able to do that, so that's kind of cool.

I've been unable to focus on much lately. I don't have many ideas, either, and that's why all of my magnapina work in 2026 has just been me recoding pages. I've realized I'm not really a person capable of original thoughts or ideas. Maybe all the creativity I had as a kid has been beaten out of me by the past 6 years of mental illness & comparisons & overthinking. I think I hit a wall, and instead of working to improve, I decided to just settle for mediocrity forever, because it's easiest. I'll probably just keep poorly mimicking everything I see for the rest of my life. At least I can have fun with it.

I miss old Deviantart journals where you could fill out your current mood and what you were listening to and eating and drinking and whatnot. I was going to think of how to put that here, but I'm not sure how I'd want it to look/how to not have it look weird. I'm currently feeling attacked by mosquitoes.